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The Emporers old bias...



*Update*This is definitely a very dry satire, but once you get it, it's hilarious!
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Here is a response to an mac mini review found here:

Jorge (jorge at divisiontwo dot com),

This is concerning your latest article on the mac mini:. First I have to say, how did you find time to come up with all that text that say virtually nothing? And what about fact checking?

Take for instance your comparison on the weight and size of the mini. You claim that Apple claims 'the new Mini is “smaller than most packs of gum” and weighs “less than four quarters”.' Have you even looked at their site? Did you watch the mac world video? Or are you actually just talking out of your ass?

I believe, either the later, or you are letting your bias confuse you. The claims about the pack of gum and weight are, and were, clearly stated as claims for the iPod Shuffle. In fact if you simply visit their site, http://www.apple.com/ipodshuffle/, you will see this picture:

They say a picture says a thousand words. Well you could have saved half your article with this one.

And as far as the size goes, did you miss the freaking huge slide with the exact dimensions of the mac mini?! You know, 6.5x6.5x2 2.9lb's? No of course you didn't; you just wanted to sound smart by giving the real specs as something you "found on your own."

Second, you make claims that they include a stripped down version of their OS called OS X on 500 Laptops. Man are you misinformed. Been a while since you've used a real OS? OS X is the full Operating System with freeBSD running as the basis; and not stripped down either. You either don't want your readers to know this, or you don't understand what this means either, so I'll explain.

freeBSD is a Unix variant. Unix has been around for 20 some years now. The internet runs mostly do to this "stripped down" OS. Blah, blah, blah. I could talk about all of the benefits to real programmers, such as those who program in C/C++, ASM, Objective C, Java, Ruby, et cetera, but you wouldn't listen. And I shouldn't have to because it's stated right on Apple's website. If you're a developer check out the developer section: http://developer.apple.com/ (sorry no vbscript there).

Now on to the apps...

Why isn't there a defrag? Well quite simply because it automatically defrags with every installation, and it checks for fragmentation on boot, as well as hdd consistency (a lovely unix tool being used there), and you can check through the disk utility tool, and there's several command line tools to do this. But I think I'm beating a dead horse on that one.

Thank God that there is no vbscript support in Mail! eMail is eMail and should be distinctly a mode of communication; not application. Most of your damn virus problems are because of vbscript! And your claim about developing vbscript and passing it out with your mates is a bunch of trash. If you develop vb already, then you don't need Outlook Express to check the code for you. you can do it in power point, office, vb studio, or any of Microsoft's various vb development IDE's. You don't need OE for that, and you shouldn't try and trick others into buying that line.

Virus protection... Name more than 5 virus' that are on OS X ravaging the system as we speak. Name one that's valid with the latest security updates. Name more than 1 that can take advantage of OS X in it's default settings.

You do that research and then you can tell me why it's irresponsible to not have virus protection on. And while you're at it why not explain to me how responsible Microsoft is being by doing the same: (what do you mean the OEM bundles the software?! And your saying Microsoft doesn't have it built in by default?!).

Well I suppose you could go buy the 2-3, mostly unused, Virus software packages that are out there for OS X. Then again why bother?

There is a difference you don't point out to your readers. Microsoft has to have virus protection because there OS is based on insecurity by default, and built in security will not come for another 3-4 years (2007-10 for that feature in longhorn now?). Meanwhile, OS X is based on extreme security by default. It's actually quite hard to sidestep the tried and true Unix method of security that has been around since Bill Gates was in high school.

Reliability is key too. You said you bet these will be slow after a few months? If they are anything like the previous Apple's I have around, try years, or not at all. Since I switched over and bought my first iBook I have had nothing but praise and respect for Apple. No more waiting for excuses and counting down release dates until Microsoft will fulfill the promises they made for Windows 98 that have still not come to fruition.

No more having to tell my clients their project is going to be delayed by another month because my computer crashed while I was backing up the project, won't boot again without wiping the drive, and I can't recover anything off the drive, so I'll have to code from week to month old backups, just to catch back up to speed! No more having to reformat my drive weekly (with XP Pro) just to keep my systems going long enough to finish my projects.

Trust me, if you use your computer as a tool, and not a gaming system primarily, then you want something reliable, and the only thing like that is Unix based. Why do you think most ISP's run their system critical stuff off of freeBSD? It's because they have millions riding on it; not some ego trip or trivial computer OS war hangup.

As far as Safari goes, take IE and visit some real web standard compliant sites. MSN.com is not Standards Compliant. I challenge you to make one fully compliant page, with zero table layouts, using only css (1,2, and 3) and div's, load it up on Mozilla, IE, Opera, and Safari, and compare. Post screenshots if you like. Just try programming in pure standards for a living and you will curse the day that IE was ever born.

The truth is, you are trying to build your own reality field here. You want to impress everyone with your knowledge, which you have a vested interest in Mr. MCSE and DeVry graduate, and you are trying to build a career out of this suppossed knowledge. I'm afraid you paid a bit too much money for the Emperor's new Certification there btw.

Don't try to foist your bias on other people, trying to show that you are not biased by writing a biased article. Try this, you don't have to buy a mac, go get some freeBSD or Linux. Knock yourself out. Use it in real life for at least a year: run Virtual PC or vmWare and Windows on it if you must. Then when you want reliability and ease of use, go get a mac, and an open mind.

Write an article on your true experiences.

I expect a reply and have posted this on my blog and soon to be osNews

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